No-Bake Cereal Cookies

Recipe # 8: p. 287, No-Bake Cereal Cookies--Rosemary Moyer, North Newton, Kansas

brown sugar
light corn syrup
vanilla
peanut butter
cereal flakes
flaked coconut (optional)

I made these no-bake cereal cookies for my children's three-year old birthday party, and they were easy to make and a huge success.  My children's birthdays in August and my upcoming birthday in October has caused me to reflect on my own childhood.

By nature, I was an anxious and sensitive child.  I was easily overwhelmed when I heard stories of people suffering.  When I was about five years old, I remember seeing a cartoon with a character wearing a barrel held up by suspenders.  That night, I have a distinct memory of praying for that man to get clothes.

Whenever I saw a person holding a sign asking for money on the side of the road, I would ask my parents to go buy food to give to him or her.  We did this quite a few times during my childhood.

My feelings of wanting to help others were out of kindness, but more than anything, they were from guilt.  Why did I have things and other people didn't?  Why were people mean to others?  Why don't people share the food they have?

As I moved into my teenage years, my intense desire to not see people hurting continued, but the world began showing itself to be more cruel and unforgiving than I could handle.  Life seemed overwhelming, chaotic, scary, and unmanageable, and I did not feel prepared to face this world as an adult.

According to the book Easy to Love, Difficult to Discipline by Becky A. Bailey, there are seven powers for self-control necessary for individuals to learn and practice. I always had family, friends, and church members who loved me and let me know that they loved me.  But there was a disconnect that did not allow me to learn the powers of self-control that Bailey writes about; the powers of: attention, love, acceptance, perception, intention, free will, and unity.  Being ill-equipped with the powers of self-control, I turned to other forms of surviving the overwhelming feelings of fear I had.
http://www.amazon.com/Easy-Love-Difficult-Discipline-Cooperation/dp/0060007753

As a young child, obsessive compulsive thoughts and behaviors had already manifested, and by the fifth grade, those obsessive compulsive thoughts became centered on my physical body.  I have memories of asking my mom and my sister multiple times a day if I was fat or pudgy.  After my sophomore year of high school, those thoughts became obsessive compulsive behaviors.

I went on a diet to lose weight the summer after tenth grade, and that was the beginning of me engaging in eating disordered behavior.  It began a long road of isolation, self-hatred, and continued guilt.  

After many years of therapy and recovery work with people who love me deeply, one of the things that I have discovered about having an eating disorder, is that it does exactly the opposite of what I intended it to do.

I wanted to be in control of my body, how I looked, how people perceived me, and what they thought about what I looked like.  I wanted to be perfect and not do anything that would allow people to be upset with me for any reason.

It numbed the sensitive, caring side of me that allowed me to see people in need and want to help them.  Instead, it made me only able to think about myself, about my body, about my weight.

My ability to empathize was diminished, which consequently lowered my ability for compassion.  Empathy is "the capacity to recognize emotions that are being experienced by another sentient or fictional being. One may need to have a certain amount of empathy before being able to experience accurate sympathy or compassion." http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Empathy

And being in a state of semi-starvation did not allow for me to expend any energy on recognizing the emotions being experienced by those around me.  All I could focus on was my need to restrict calories, exercise more, and lose more weight.

The article "Empathy and social functioning in anorexia nervosa before and after recovery" by Robin Morris, Jessica Bramhan, Emma Smith, and Kate Tchanturia, comes to the following conclusion:
    "Results. The acute AN (anorexia nervosa) group reported lower levels of empathy than the recovered AN group and  HC (healthy control), but they also reported less antisocial behaviour. No differences were found in emotional recognition or social conformity.

Conclusions. These results suggest that emotional empathy is reduced during acute AN. Lower levels of antisocial behaviour may reflect a contrasting desire of people with AN to minimise presentation of antisocial behaviour in the acute state."
https://kclpure.kcl.ac.uk/portal/en/publications/empathy-and-social-functioning-in-anorexia-nervosa-before-and-after-recovery%28f4af3016-2076-4964-8cce-c9af828ef2ec%29.html

So, according to this article, I was able to recognize emotions and artificially conform socially to fit in with the people around me, but I was unable to fake it with being empathetic.

Once my body, brain, soul, and spirit were well nourished with food and love, I was able to learn how to empathize with people in a way that allowed me to show compassion not based on guilt. 

Empathy is a skill that is essential for individuals to learn but seems to be increasingly difficult to teach to our children.  Lack of empathy comes from a focus on self for whatever reason and getting one's own needs met.

A comedian named Louis C.K. was recently in an interview where he said the following about his hatred for cell phones:
"And they (kids) don’t look at people when they talk to them and they don’t build the empathy. You know, kids are mean, and it’s ’cause they’re trying it out. They look at a kid and they go, 'you’re fat,' and then they see the kid’s face scrunch up and they go, 'oh, that doesn’t feel good to make a person do that.' But they got to start with doing the mean thing. But when they write 'you’re fat,' then they just go, 'mmm, that was fun, I like that.'" http://lybio.net/louis-c-k-hates-cell-phones/comedy/

 As a person with AN, my empathy was hampered by my isolation within my physical body.  Many of us today are experiencing this same isolation due to our computers, cell phones, single-family dwellings, individual cars, and the ability to do everything for ourselves. 

Isolation diminishes empathy, which leads to less compassion, which allows for violence.  The violence that I inflicted was on my own body.  Other people's isolation becomes violence turned on others.

The More-with-Less cookbook challenges us as disciples of Jesus to empathize with the hungry of the world and show compassion on others by recognizing that the choices we make about our own food are not isolated decisions.

As Longacre states,"Communication happens swiftly in our world.  How can we continue overeating in the face of starvation and be at peace with ourselves and our neighbors...Jesus recognized the desire to get more and more as a destructive force when he asked, 'For what will it profit them if they gain the whole world but forfeit their life?'" p. 24

 We do not live in isolation, but we act as if we do, which leads to lack of empathy, which in turn leads to violence.  To counter this destructive chain, we must actively seek to follow Jesus and his example of empathy and compassion towards others.
   

Anneliese's post on: For Everything a Season

Thank you to Anneliese for publishing what she wrote for my blog on her personal blog: http://foreverythingaseason.blogspot.com/.

I have appreciated the dialogue that we have been able to have about food and faith and look forward to more dialogue with others.

Mashed Potato Casserole

Recipe # 7: p. 230, Mashed Potato Casserole--Helen June Martin, Ephrata, Pennsylvania
potatoes
sour cream or yogurt
salt
pepper
sugar
margarine
milk
dill seed
chives
cooked spinach
cheddar cheese

I made this recipe a couple of weeks ago with no real anxiety leading up to it, while cooking it, or when I tasted it.  It was very easy to make and came out great.  I hadn't allocated enough prep time to skin the potatoes, so it wasn't finished baking in time for our family dinner that night.  But it re-heated really well the next couple of days, and the family all enjoyed it.

In the past, this recipe's name alone would have scared me away.  Mashed potatoes conjure up memories of butter and holiday meals with an excess of food surrounding me.  Too many people would inevitably comment on my appearance and small amount of food consumption. 

Casseroles represented a place for secret fatty ingredients like butter, cream, and many other "scary" foods to hide.  I imagined that people would add things to recipes to cause me to gain weight, and casseroles were a great place to hide calories.

Although I sound like I was paranoid, well-meaning people in my life have resorted to these types of methods in an attempt to do what they thought it would take to save my life.

When we love people, we resort to extraordinary and ludicrous acts to protect those people.  Sometimes they are healthy for the relationship, and sometimes they are not.  Regardless, they are an attempt to put that love into action.

When a family is affected by an eating disorder, the whole family suffers.  So do any of the people who love the individual with an eating disorder (ED).  Many people look for a cause for the ED.  They search for a treatment and a cure.  They want answers to questions like: Why does this happen?  What causes it?  How can we stop it?

But what they really want to know is: Did I do anything that led to my loved one's ED?  Did I do something wrong?  Didn't I love her/him enough?

In short the answers are: Yes, you did something that eventually influenced your loved one to use an ED as a coping mechanism.  Yes, you did something wrong in your relationship with the person you love.  No, you didn't love her/him enough.

Before you get mad and think that I am blaming parents and other loved ones for EDs, keep reading...

There is not consensus on what causes an eating disorder.  The National Eating Disorder Association list various psychological, interpersonal, social, and biological factors that may contribute to eating disorders.
http://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/factors-may-contribute-eating-disorders

The infuriating and depressing thing about not knowing what causes eating disorders is that we do not have a guaranteed way to treat them.  And when you also know the following facts, it is almost more than a person can handle:

 Between 5-20% of individuals struggling with anorexia nervosa will die.  The probabilities of death   increases within that range depending on the length of the condition.

Anorexia nervosa has one of the highest death rates of any mental health condition. http://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/anorexia-nervosa

But back to what I said earlier:
We ALL do things that influence our loved ones to use unhealthy coping mechanisms.
We ALL do things in our relationships that are not loving.
We ALL will never be able to love a person enough.

I am not trying to excuse people's poor attempts at loving one another, just pointing out that many of the things in our relationships that cause conflict are motivated by our love for others.  But sometimes we try to love others by controlling them. 

I can choose to remain angry and resentful that the people who love me sometimes tried to control my actions, or I can choose to acknowledge that they were loving me in the best way that they knew how.

Only God can love us in a way that is always healthy and supportive and patient.  The rest of our relationships will be full of blundered attempts at putting our love into action.

The important thing to remember for people with anorexia nervosa and those who love them is that we are not working against each other.  We are on the same side.  We must work together  more openly and honestly, so that we can heal wounds, reconcile resentments, and find healthy ways of loving one another to ensure that the people with AN can live long, joyful, lives; lives that can be dedicated to being disciples of Jesus.

*The National Eating Disorder Association has many resources to help people as they are supporting their loved ones recover from an eating disorder. 
http://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/parent-family-friends-network

Guest Blog from: Anneliese of mennonitegirlscancook.ca

Michelle Porter's introduction:
I discovered the blog http://www.mennonitegirlscancook.ca/ and really enjoy the idea of Mennonite recipes being shared in a blog and now in a cookbook.  

The contributors describe their blog in the following way:
We are a group of ten women who share recipes and and our faith, with a purpose, inspiring hospitality while using our resources to help needy people around the world.  A simple recipe blog that started to document our family favorite recipes began in 2008 has resulted in two cookbooks.
Mennonite Girls Can Cook .. . is more than just recipes. We encourage you to think about HOSPITALITY versus entertaining. Our hope is that you find the joy in BLESSING versus impressing.  Our recipes are about taking God's bounty, and co-creating the goodness from God's creation into something that we can use to bless family, friends and those who need a caring meal.  We take everyday ingredients to make recipes which will nourish, provide energy and delight our taste buds. 

 http://www.mennonitegirlscancook.ca/p/about-us.html

I contacted the women with a list of ideas about food, faith, being Mennonite, and eating disorders, and Anneliese found one of my questions intriguing and has written a guest blog.  

I appreciate her thoughtful response and hope that it encourages continued dialogue about eating disorders, food, and faith.

Food and Faith

Question: How did growing up in a Russian Mennonite family affect your relationship to food? Did your family come from a history of shortage? If so, how does that affect how you view food consumption/restriction now?

From Anneliese of mennonitegirlscancook.ca

 

Growing up in a Mennonite home I knew that my mom would always have something prepared for meals. Even when she worked full-time, I never heard an excuse coming from her, saying she did not have time to cook.  There was not a lazy bone in her, the biblical meaning of which was lived out in both of my parents’ lives. She made things from scratch as much as possible, ever conscious of the cost of prepared foods. She prepared ahead by having keeping basic ingredients in the house, making soups, baking breads and preparing home-made food to pack for lunches. We did not grow up with snacking foods, when the meal was served we were hungry and the food was nourishing. Mealtimes were family times. We waited for each other and talked about our day. It was a time to connect.

My father and my grandmother went through food shortage and hunger in Russia during the war and later, in Germany, after the war. My father had to look for food in trash cans and my grandmother shared with me how her health suffered from lack of sugar and butter. I often take her words into consideration now, with the talk of how both are not good for you. The fact that hunger was something very real to my father played a big part in how he raised us. We were not allowed to complain about food and we were not allowed to throw food from our plate into the garbage. We were taught to give thanks for our food and to be grateful for full tummies.

This brings me to something I consider to be important in my view of food, be it consumption or restriction. I believe that the giving of thanks for what God has given plays a vital role in how food affects us. When we realize food is a gift from the One who provides for our needs, we will be careful about how we handle it. We will not try to find fault with it unnecessarily, be it the ever fluctuating views about foods or just plain pickiness, which shows ungratefulness. I believe that the giving of thanks can bless food to cleanse it in instances where we have no choice. There are times I question some of today’s dietary restrictions and where they are coming from. Obviously there are situations where it is very important to follow a certain diet, but sometimes our self induced diets can lead to a life of problems, stemming from some form of worry or ungratefulness, which is exactly where the enemy of our souls would have us be. So let us give thanks to Him who made the world along with the food we eat and blessed it, proclaiming it to be good.

Exodus 23: 25

“Worship the Lord your God, and his blessing will be on your food and water. I will take away sickness from among you.”

1 Timothy 4:4

“For everything God created is good, and nothing is to be rejected if it is received with thanksgiving.”

Quick Chocolate Pudding

Recipe #8: p. 264, Quick Chocolate Pudding, Grace Whitehead, Kokomo, Indiana

sugar or honey
cornstarch
cocoa
milk
vanilla
margarine (optional)

"After being diagnosed with cancer, Doris started keeping a journal. Some of the entries addressed the writing of Living More with Less, and her frustration with how her illness prevented her from working on the manuscript."

"Journal Entry—November 4, 1979 (written from Hershey Medical center)
I so much want to complete this book, one of the creative works of my life. But weighed in the balance against more time with Paul, Cara, and Marta, (husband and daughters) the book is like a dry dandelion ready to blow. But I shouldn't have to make such choices. If I get well enough to work on the book I will have time with my family."

 "Doris died quietly, peaceably, and surrounded by family on November 10, 1979, the manuscript not yet completed.
But the unfinished manuscript itself may be symbolic. The task of living responsible is never finished. In her preface to the More-with-Less Cookbook Doris describes the search for more responsible eating as a "kind of holy frustration." This holy frustration for more-with-less living needs to continue in our households, travel, recreation, and church life."
http://www.heraldpress.com/Bios/Longacre/journal.html 

Doris kept a list of things she felt were the frivolities of life—things one should not let get in the way of the enjoyment of living.
Life is too short to ice cakes; cakes are good without icing.
Life is too short to read all the church periodicals.
Life is too short not to write regularly to your parents.
Life is too short to eat factory baked bread.
Life is too short to keep all your floors shiny.
Life is too short to let a day pass without hugging your spouse and each of your children.
Life is too short to nurse grudges and hurt feelings.
Life is too short to worry about getting ready for Christmas; just let Christmas come.
Life is too short to spend much money on neckties and earrings.
Life is too short for nosy questions like "How do you like your new pastor?" Or—if there’s been a death—"How is he taking it?"
Life is too short to be gone from home more than a few nights a week.
Life is too short not to take a nap when you need one.
Life is too short to care whether purses match shoes or towels match bathrooms.
Life is too short to stay indoors when the trees turn color in fall, when it snows, or when the spring blossoms come out.
Life is too short to miss the call to worship on a Sunday morning.
Life is too short for bedspreads that are too fancy to sleep under.
Life is too short to work in a room without windows.
Life is too short to put off Bible study.
Life is too short to put off improving our relationships with the people we live with.
 http://www.heraldpress.com/Bios/Longacre/

If anyone is following my posts, you may have noticed that I skipped from Recipe #6 to Recipe #8.  I have already made Recipe #7, but this one feels more timely.

Today, my daughter turns three years old, and I made chocolate pudding for her birthday.  The recipe called for very few ingredients, and the instructions were very simple: Combine ingredients.  Cook.  Stir constantly unti thickened.

This sounded simple enough, and, in reality, it was.  I just did not have realistic expectations for how long it takes for pudding to thicken.

I really enjoy stirring pots of cooking food, and I always have.  I have fond memories of stirring pots of sauce or holiday foods when my family was cooking.

And the process of watching cornstarch turn powder and liquid materials into a thickened substance, was really quite intriguing for me.

But it took forty-five minutes of constant stirring for my Quick Chocolate Pudding to thicken.  Those were forty-five minutes that I could have been reading a book with my daughter, or tickling her, or telling her stories about her first three years of life.

While I agree with Longacre, that Americans in general overeat sugar and processed foods (More-with-Less p. 21), I also believe that she is correct when she says, "There is not just one way to respond, nor is there a single answer to the world's food problem.  It may not be within our capacity to effect an answer.  But it is within our capacity to search for a faithful response" (More-with-Less p. 13).

This search for a faithful response must also take into Longacre's list of Life is too short...

And for me, life might just be too short to make my own pudding in the future.

Quick Fruit Cobbler

Recipe #6: p. 273, Quick Fruit Cobbler--Jocele Meyer, Brooklyn, Ohio

sugar
flour
milk
baking powder

salt

"A dessert is (almost by definition) a food containing sugar.  But before getting into dessert recipes, let's remind ourselves that not all meals require a sweet ending.  The daily dessert habit is firmly entrenched in North America, but not with most other people.  In many countries sweets are used for celebrations only, not to top off everyday meals."  More-with-Less, p. 261

My son turned three about a week ago.  He loves food and eating, which is both helpful and difficult for me as a person with anorexia nervosa.

It can be difficult  when he gets down from breakfast and immediately asks about snack.  It can be difficult when I ask him what his favorite part of the day was and he names a food he ate. It can be difficult when it seems like so many of his thoughts revolve around food.

It can be helpful when I realize that he is learning to care for his needs and his body. It can be helpful when I realize that he shows as much joy and exuberance for food as for everything else in life.  It is helpful when I realize that so many of my thoughts also revolve around food, but at least his are about his enjoyment of eating.

So, when I asked him what he wanted to do for his birthday, "cake" was his response.  He also listed play with cars, and sing "Happy Birthday," but food was definitely part of his desire for his special day.

I used to believe that I could engage in a celebration with other people and not partake of the food.  It was my way of saying, "The food has nothing to do with my relationship with these people.  I can be a part of this relationship just as much as everybody else, regardless if I am eating with them.  My family and friends should love me for me, not for what I do or do not eat."

But over the past 10 years of therapy and recovery work that I have done, I have come to understand that my belief was false.  Eating a meal with someone is a way of sharing life with them, loving them, and letting them love me.


Of course, for food to be a healthy part of a relationship, people have to be healthy and mature enough to not use food as a way to guilt, manipulate, or shame themselves or each other.

My son's birthday offered an opportunity for me to choose a dessert to share with him to celebrate the day of his birth.  It also allowed me to support Longacre's view about the over-consumption of sugar and desserts in the U.S. by choosing a dessert that limits the amount of sugar and takes advantage of the natural sweetness of fruit.

I chose to use Granny Smith apples in the recipe, and it tasted pretty good.  The edges browned more quickly than the middle, so I did not cook it for as long as the recipe indicated.  Next time, I will cook it for the correct amount of time and try a glass baking dish instead of a metal pan.  

So, along my journey to recover from disordered eating and to be a faithful disciple of Jesus, I am learning to eat during celebrations while also thinking about the foods that are part of the celebration.  I do not have to buy a traditional U.S. birthday cake loaded with sugar and frosting.  I can make a cake or cobbler from More-with-Less that provides recipes that value celebrating and caring for God's earth and people.

As Longacre shares, "Sugar never was good for us...We've long been aware of sugar's role in tooth decay, diabetes, and obesity."
 "Much land now devoted to sugar should be used for other crops yielding proteins, vitamins, and minerals." More-with-Less, p. 260-261

Sitting around the kitchen table with my son and the rest of my family enjoying cobbler was a moment free of guilt, manipulation, and shame as I ate a dessert that tasted good.  It allowed me to use food  to celebrate in a way that felt joyful and also faithful.

Cake is the biggest temptation in life

"'Doctors are allowed to tell us things which they might not do themselves.  They know what the right this is, but they may not be able to do it themselves.  That does not mean that their advice is bad advice.'"  Mma Potokwane p. 109

p. 110
"'Maybe there are people who would say that I eat too much cake.'"

"'But you do not eat too much, do you?'" observed Mma Ramotswe.

Mma Potokwane's response came quickly.  "'No, I do not.  I do not eat too much cake.'" She paused, and looked wistfully at her now emptying plate. "'Sometimes I would like to eat too much cake.  That is certainly true.  Sometimes I am tempted.'"

Mma Ramotswe sighed.  "'We are all tempted, Mma.  We are all tempted when it come to cake.'"

"'That is true,'" said Mma Potokwane sadly.  "'There are many temptations in this life, but cake is probably one of the biggest of them.'"

p. 111
"'Temptation is very difficult,'" said Mma Ramotswe quietly.  "'I do not always resist it.  I am not a strong woman in that respect.'"

"'I am glad you said that,"' said Mma Potokwane.  "'I am not strong either.  For example, right at the moment, I am thinking of cake.'"

"'And so am I,'" confessed Mma Ramotswe.

Mma Potokwane stood up and shouted to the girl outside.  "'Two more pieces of cake, please.  Two big slices.'"

From the No. 1 Ladies' Detective Agency Series In the Company of Cheerful Ladies 


I love reading series of novels during the summer.  As a child, I read Nancy Drew, The Boxcar Children, and many others.  This summer, I discovered the delightful No. 1 Ladies' Detective Agency series about a woman in Botswana, Africa who starts a detective agency.

Each book has various mysteries, but the majority of the books deal with issues in Botswana and the rest of Africa, rights of women, education, cultural norms, changing societies, and many other intriguing topics.

Written by a Swedish man who was born in Zimbabwe, Africa, I have enjoyed gaining more knowledge about Botswana.  Particularly interesting to me have been references to food, bodies, and body image.  Mma Ramotswe, the protagonist, is proud of being a traditionally built lady and makes various comments about thin women and feeling sorry for them.

In Morality for Beautiful Girls, Mma Ramotswe is described as follows:
"She had a taste for sugar, however, and this meant that a doughnut or a cake might follow the sandwich. She was a traditionally built lady, after all, and she did not have to worry about dress size, unlike those poor, neurotic people who were always looking in mirrors and thinking that they were too big. What was too big, anyway? Who was to tell another person what size they should be? It was a form of dictatorship, by the thin, and she was not having any of it. If these thin people became any more insistent, then the more generously sized people would just have to sit on them. Yes, that would teach them! Hah!”

I have been unable to reconcile this description with the cake scene.  If Mma Ramotswe really does feel justified in being a traditionally built lady, why is language like temptation, confessed, and resist used to describe cake?

And while her question, "What was too big, anyway?" might be valid, why does she go on to judge thin people as poor and neurotic, accusing them of the dictatorship of the thin?

In the U.S., with an epidemic of obesity and an obsession with thinness, the messages are just as mixed up and confusing.  It would be easy for one to believe from the media that everyone in the U.S. is either obese or dangerously thin.  We all either need to be losing or gaining weight.  We are all weak and tempted and just need to resist the enemies, which arefood and our bodies. 

I believe that people who are unhealthily overweight would live a more fulfilled life if they were able to lose weight.  I believe that people who are unhealthily underweight would live a more fulfilled life if they were able to gain weight.

I believe that we would all live more fulfilled lives if there were not a gigantic scale that we used to measure our physical bodies, and therefore our "goodness" or "badness".

While I appreciate that the U.S. government and medical profession have launched campaigns in the war against obesity and the modeling world and advertisement professions have spoken out against the dangers of eating disorders, I hope expectantly for a day when the phrase "real women" is no longer used.

What is a "real woman"?
Do real women always have curves?
Are real women not the models who walk the runway? 
 I choose to answer the first question based on my Christian Mennonite beliefs and faith.

Real women are disciples of Jesus.

The rest of the questions don't really need to be answered.